Friday, January 13, 2017

On A New Path

Hello! So much has changed since my last post.  I knew there would be a lot of changes, but I had no idea how wonderful so many of them would be, and how sad some would be.

Since April (well really January), I feel like my life has gone from me feeling like things were out of my control, to slowly feeling like I could get back on track creating the life that I want. I met new people, was exposed to new energies and inspirations. I'm so glad that things were put into motion that led me away from a job that I was so unhappy and unfulfilled with.

I started my new job in August. I'm teaching elementary art again, and I absolutely love it.  I feel like I am in the right place. I love my coworkers and I absolutely adore the students. I look forward to getting to work every day. In fact it's been almost 6 months and I haven't missed a day of work yet. :) At my other job, I was trying to leave early or calling in for personal days all the time. So nice loving your job.

On October 26th, I lost my favorite person in the world, my dear grandmother. She was 97, and I realize that is a wonderful long life, but I wanted more. I still don't think I have really been able to process it. She was the only person in my entire life that was there for me no matter what and never ever let me believe that I was anything but perfect the way I am and always made me feel loved and wanted. I miss her so much. I got to have her in my life almost a full 14 years longer than I had my mother. I didn't even know that she was in the hospital until it was too late to get to her, but I sure tried. I drove 5 hours straight without even packing and was one hour too late. I feel like a gained a guardian angel though.

I learned too, what my limits are for mistreatment this past year. I could not get my head around understanding that one of the sweetest and most beautiful people I have ever seen in my life could treat me so callously, or why I felt such emotional shock after each of our times together. I felt happy and cared for one moment and then hollow and stunned by being completely dismissed the next. I gave myself 5 months to try to figure it out, and I missed him terribly, so I thought I would reach out and try at least being friends. I really thought he could be a mentor to me, and he was such a muse to me that I thought it was worth figuring out. I mean surely all of these people that adore him had to be right, but I just walked right into being treated worse that I was in the first place. So disappointing. I would never dream of treating anyone like that. It just means that I have more work to do on myself to not allow that treatment in my life period. My life, career and heart are too important to expose myself to that anymore.

I am finally able to start getting myself feeling strong and healthy. I have begun aerial silks classes and start yoga next month. Next I will get my piano tuned and start lessons. Baby steps, but I'm getting to keep myself busy learning things which is what I love to do. It's exciting feeling like myself again. I love feeling healthy, strong, and laughing a lot. I'm hoping 2017, despite the political fights ahead, will be inspiring, fulfilling, and filled with opportunities to create, explore and to give and receive LOVE.

I'll leave you with some images of what I've created since my last post and some of my amazing student's work!

Happy New Year!!!


Bulletin board in the front of my classroom

Student artwork 

Some of my own artwork finished or created since July.